The difference between a Good Day and a Bad Day? The voicemail message from your radiology doctor. Today was a Good Day. My Stereotactic biopsy for my left breast came in and it was negative. No cancer on the left side. Made my day. No, 'Call me, I have your results.' or 'No matter what time it is even if you have to call my cell phone, we must speak today.' Only "Just wanted you to go into the weekend with good news. The left side is benign. Have a great weekend."
I had such a great day today. That news was so very welcome. Then I got a beautiful arrangement from Viki, Mike, Juli, and Matt. It is wonderful. It's out on the balcony, and looks terrific out there. I only hope I can keep it going until my mom gets here, the woman who truly has a green thumb, unlike my black thumb. Thank you so much. Then I opened a card from my friends Julie and David, you know how to make me smile. Then another from John and Bonnie. A singing card that warmed my heart. I went off to the Soka Gkkai International Center, and met Rose where I tried to keep up with the chanting. I'm a beginner and I can't believe how fast Nam-myoho-renge-kyo can be chanted. I'll get there, but I think I belong in the beginner's class. lol After the meeting, Rose took me to the bookstore at the center and gave me a set of prayer beads. What a lovely gift. Thank you Rosie. I picked a green set or rather they seemed to pick me. I feel great everyone, and I know, I know there will be many days I won't, there will be many days I'll want to give up, but I'm going to focus really hard on not having many. Ideally, I'd like to say I had one really bad day, the first day of diagnosis, and the rest never came close.
Tomorrow I have the MRI of my shoulder for Dr. Berman, and the rest of the weekend is mine to enjoy. I look forward to this weekend. It is the second to last weekend I have with Ed before he heads off to Albany to begin work on The Seafarer at Cap Rep for six weeks.
It's funny, I've spent all of Sarah's 18 years of life prepared for the "Left Shoe" to fall; fall on Sarah, not me. Now, that shoe has fallen on my head. Unprepared, dazed and confused, hurt, feeling betrayed by the Universe, I've risen to the occasion. It's odd for me to take care of me, and yet, it feels good to care about me and only me. I'm finding my family can and will pick up the slack, I guess I never gave them the opportunity nor did I make them. I can't believe how easy it is. I thought if I did that nothing would get done. What a fool I was. I'm so proud of my family and how strong everyone is. I guess I've done okay. We are all strong, I don't have to be strong for everyone, I just forgot to be strong for me.
Have a great nite!
Melissa
.jpg)
No comments:
Post a Comment