So the day before the big day. Mr. Lumpy's last day on Earth. It was a beautiful day. I rose early and joined Rose at SGI Center, and had a really good chant. Then off to Whole Foods for a little oatmeal and coffee and good conversation with new friends. As I walked home I realized how lucky I am. Old friends and new. They all care. All wishing for a positive outcome. All sending prayers and energy of healing. I have a lot of energy, and take my mom and Ian out for Mr. Lumpy's "Last Supper". Then we went to Trader Joe's to stock up on food for the week so my mom doesn't have to schelp up there at all this week. We talk and talk, and laugh and laugh. My mom offers to pay for a cab up and back, and Ian remarks, "But it's only 1/2 a mile!" Funny how we New Yorkers take walking for granted. To us 6th ST to 14 St is a nothing walk. Ian and I walk home easily from all the way up near Lincoln Center, and think nothing of it. My mom, who is car bound while in Phoenix, rightly so, thinks walking to Trader Joe's a huge feat. I joke and tell her, "We can rest along the way, but you are now in Nana Boot Camp, and walk is what we do here. You'll go home and no one will recognize you because you will lose weight and get in shape." Two for the price of one, cancer-free and help my mom get in shape.
My mom made Avocado Soup for dinner and Joe came over for the last minute hug and get together before the surgery. Spirits are running high. Then my sister called, at last. She's known since August 27, the day I found out, and nothing until now. I'm grateful that she called, but I can't help but feel "a little too little, a little too late". She made the wire, but only just made it. Why even call, except to clear a guilty mind. The forever running stream of ill will between sisters. I love her, and I know she loves me, but really...what took her so long to call? and no one can answer to my brother, Lon. Still no word, and I really honestly don't want one. There is nothing he can say to make it better now. He missed the opportunity to mend a bridge. I sent emails, my mom called. that's where he is, stuck in a world of self. I didn't expect him to call, still it would have been a MFO (mandatory family opportunity) moment and appreciated.
So I look to my friends, my dear friends old and new, who have never failed to come through for me, who bolster me up on bad days, and cheer me on to victory. You can't choose your family, but you certainly can choose your friends. I believe I have chosen extremely well, for I am the richest girl in NYC. I have friends across this nation who, from day one, have been there, have prayed, have encouraged, have made this road a lot more smooth. I am so blessed to have you all in my life, and I don't take the walk for granted, I don't take your friendship for granted, and I don't now, nor will I ever take your love for granted. I love you all. You make it possible for me to go on with strength and courage. To fight and to win. Mr. Lumpy you will be history come tomorrow, never to return, never to rob me of anything again.
To bed, to rest, to envision the most miraculous recovery ever!
8 hours and 30 minutes till the rest of my new life.
Nite!
Love and Light
Melissa
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